While I know that all of this is a necessary part of the process, it has all felt very sterile. Because there is no belly to rub, no little kicks to feel, it is very hard for it to feel real in the middle of eighty-seven trips to the doctor's office, background checks, and fingerprinting! I have been surprised by how frustrated I feel. Not frustrated by the process, but frustrated by not knowing who I am doing it for. And so I pray. Pray for the little boy or girl or both. Pray for their safety, pray for their health, pray for them to be with their forever family soon.